Irrational Fears

Talking about my dislike for lizards has reminded me of other irrational fears I have. This is me pretty much poking fun at myself.

1. Bugs of the flying variety. Best story to prove this, on a road trip to Shasta Lake for a weekend on a houseboat, we stopped at a gas station for well you know what for. I got out of the car and turned towards the mini mart, only to have a bug of the flying variety fly in to my EYE! I started screaming (purely involuntary reaction) and Tiff was saddled with the responsibility of inspecting my eye for the offending bug. Life around me is never dull, and yes its hard being my friend. The worst part was that we couldn’t find the bug but my eye hurt from “something”. Hence I am now very wary about flying bugs.
2. My Mailbox and overall guilty conscience: I never go to get my mail until it is absolutely necessary. This maddens my friend and family to no end. They have to tell me to check my mail in order for me to pick up what they sent. The reason behind this, there isn’t one. I am just paranoid enough to think that I am going to get bad news, that somehow I didn’t pay a bill, I committed some fault, or other equally idiotic idea.
3. The mailbox paranoia extends to my voicemail at work. I am always paranoid that I will get a screaming client on the phone because I have somehow screwed up. Are you noticing a pattern of self doubt??
4. Lizards of course but worse than that, Snakes. In the 8th grade there was Reptile Round Up, all the critters I hate, and I am locked in a room with them. The reptile wrangler walked around handing out snakes like they are party favors, when he gets to me I immediate start backing away looking for the nearest exit. The wrangler assures me that the snake is good and I can hold him. I don’t care if the snake was Tiffany Blue with gold highlights, I don’t want to hold something that doesn’t blink and stick out its tongue to smell. The wrangler doesn’t get the point and shoves this snake in to my hands and WALKS AWAY. The snake turns to me sticks its tongue out and I drop the snake. The snake is excited he got his one chance at freedom, but of course the wrangler runs over giving me the evil eye and scoops him up. I’m sorry, I warned you about my severe dislike, if you are stupid enough to ignore me, then you pay the price.


Those are my stupid fears that developed with no real reason. Note that I call them irrational, I know I am being stupid, they just don’t make a pill to cure stupid.