Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Universal Donor

Today the Blood Letting Wagon was in the neighboring parking lot. Ok it was the Stanford Blood Traveling Blood Bank. I get a call from the Stanford blood center literally every 8 weeks to the day. You see, I am a universal donor, I have O+ blood and it can be used in transfusion with any other blood type. Funny enough, I received a phone call yesterday asking me to donate and so I made my appointment. Apparently their shortgage wasn't as dire as they first informed me, seeing as my appointment wasn't for 2 weeks. But opportunity knocked and the bus was next door and they would be able to bleed me sooner, rather than later.

But here is the thing (and my nearest and dearest will tell you) I hate blood, the sight of it, the smell of it, everything associated with it, even my own. TheBestFriend Tiff, will tell you a hoot of a story (ok, more than one) where she cut herself and I asked to see (big mistake), next thing I know my head is between my knees trying to get my world sorted out. There is another equally amusing story (amusing to others, not to me) that involves, a well learned lesson of concentrating while using a knife, screaming and tears. That was what I did, no one else.

Back to the story- so I voluntarily let the vampires relieve me of a pint of blood. Am I sure alot of you have gone thru the process of blood donations, you wait, alot. They ask you questions to make sure that you haven't put yourself in any dangerous contaminent situation. Or that you aren't using this as a way to test for AIDS or disease. They are all reasonable questions to guard against passing along diseases, but I swear can't they keep my answers on file and I can update as needed. Then they lead you to this recliner thingy, well today I wore a dress. Not exactly blood donation attire. But the attendants were very sweet to cover me with a paper blanket to save from any embarrassing incidents that could arise while trying to get out of the recliner.

To jump sort of off topic, the last three times that I have gone to voluntarily give my blood, I have had the worst experiences. It would always turn out that the person inserting the needle in to my very visble vein, was an intern. And of course, they would do one of the following, collaspe a vein ( a vein people, its a large-ish tube, its a tiny needle, I mean is it rocket science), poke the needle sideways and manage to butt it up against the other wall of the vein, but thankfully not thru my vein. And last but not least once the intern managed to insert the needle up against the valve in my vein , causing the ENTIRE vein to vibrate with the flucuations of the valve walls. Can you say EWWWWWWW!!!! When either of these three things happened. Women in plastic splash guard masks came over and inspect and whisper among themselves and then look back at me an smile. They move the needle around and whisper some more. Now lets refer back to paragraph #2, where we explored my intolerance for all things blood ( I can't even eat roast beef). I am at this point (all three times) pale, squirming, and staring intently at the ceiling tiles counting the little holes, pray that the Splash Guard Squad will go away or at least put me out of my misery. Thankfully today I got to be in the careful hands of an actually R.N., so you can imagine my excitement when I realized that that I might get out of this experience relatively unscathed. And I did! The only mildly disconcerting this that occurred was when after holdling my arm above my head for two minutes, I took my arm down and the nurse removes the gauze I had been viceing down on my arm, only to have the blood almost immediately geyser out of the needle hole. Whoooops, back up for two minutes. The blood draining out of my face earned me a 15 minutes time out in the recliner.

All in all, a much more positive experience that the other times. And after all this, I swear I can hear you asking, exactly WHY do you donate blood again?

Monday, August 29, 2005

There Is A Full Moon Rising

Do you ever have one of those weekends and then a Monday that makes you think you should have gone to bed on Friday and woken up Monday. Well my weekend sort of went like that. I swear there was a full moon, because this weekend wasn't my weekend. While Friday night for the most part was fun, Michele and I have found a new stomping ground "The Buddha Lounge",but a little after drinking snack ended up giving me food poisoning. So you can imagine that my Saturday was filled with sore stomach muscles and a wary distaste of food. Also it was fully equipped with a level of exhaustion I have never experienced before. I practically fell in to bed and was blessed with a sinus migraine. It was like having the right side of my skull crushed in. Yay me, another fun filled day of pain and deprived sleep. I walked thru Sunday like a zombie, a fog encased my entire brain with no hopes of subsiding. Early to bed early to rise right? Nah, couldn't sleep of course. And the cherry on my sundae, this morning as I am walking down the stairs to work, I slip on the last few and go down like a prize fighter, only to pop up again with one badly scraped knee. I tell ya' Full Moon.......

Friday, August 26, 2005

Public Service Announcement-I've Got Dollar Bills!!!

Yes its that time again for my ever so cleverly written diatribe about the other sex. Ok I just looked up diatribe as a descriptive word and its a little harsh. So I will revert back to satire, ah thats better. Thank you

Are you intrigued by my title, I hope so. I had forgotten this particular juicy story until I ran in to the victim the other weekend. So not only do you get to hear the about the original story but you also get to hear about the "encounter".

My back ground story will be shorter this time, I swear. Ok, so friend is getting married and what does every bride to be need?? NAKED MEN!!!! Its like some hazing ritual in to the sorority of wifehood. So the Sisters (my ever so wonderful gaggle of friends that are sisters to me), round up a little Bachelorette Party, because if the boys are doing it why can't we....

Up to the city we go since the Sisters found a male review. Now I have never been to a male strip club, so I had no idea what was in store for us. Let me just tell you, its a very hand on experience ;) Pun intended. But I think out of anyone I got way more of my monies worth than the rest of the Sisters. Sort of... This male review is how I met the victim of this blog. Stripper (his alias) was the MC and the last dancer of the evening. Let me tell you, I will never look at cops the same again. There defintely was a spark between and I don't mean when he was dancing. It was before he even took his clothes off. So the show finishes and we are all flushed from the excitement. My poor little heart could barely take it. ;) Yeah right, I loved every moment of it. We move in to the bar to carry out our second mission of the night, getting Bride drunk, the non sick kind of drunk. Stripper joins us for the evening after his show and proceeds to go into detail about the sexual spark between him and I. Now I was at a stage in my life were that sounds like heaven three fold: 1) hot hot hot stripper with great body wants to get his freak on with me, OK!! 2) No strings attached, none of the BS and all of the fun 3) Great story for the grandkids. YAY ME!! So I might have been a little premature on the excitement.

He sold me on this casual involvement (like I needed alot of convincing)and about a week after meeting him, I went to his place for dinner. He place was beautifully decorated, so much so that I started to have doubts about his sexual orientation. However my mind was put at ease when he "cooked" dinner. Why is it that cooking to a man involves pasta and sauce in a jar?? Sweet thought but no real effort. Thats ok I wasn't there for the food. So we finally get down the reason I am there, all the time a little " yay me, yay me" going thru my head. I am so telling the grandkids. Yay me, quickly turned in to " Are you kidding?!?!?". The first time with a new partner can be a little akward, so you chalk it up to that and sign up for the next round. In the mean time we chat on the phone almost every night, Hey, these feel like strings......

So round 2 approaches with a little less excitement and a little more wariness. But oh well, I was a girl scout, HA! No I wasn't. So I get to his place and right off he was in a bad mood, warning # 1 , and he proceeded to vent at length about the bad mood, warning #2, and closely followed by a I guess we should go in the bedroom warning #3, can you see where this is going.... Now I am an open minded girl when it comes to the extracuricular activies between the sheets as long as I feel comfortbale with my partner. What I hate....your partner in a hideous mood, hell bent on showing you who is boss in the most aggressive, degrading way possible. Needless to say I was walking to the door not long after it started.

I got two things out of this 1) Like I said before "great story", if you leave about the last tidbit I admitted to you guys 2) Ego boost, I mean he was at least hot 3) When approach with a proposition from a stripper, a little advice, his moves are on a dance floor, not in between the sheets. Do I dare say this is the end of my story..... noooooo.

Last weekend (I met Stripper in March) I ran in to Stripper while he was on a date. I almost hugged the girl and told her it wasn't worth getting cleaned up for. But I resisted, I mean who am I to rain on his parade*.

* It was my good deed for the day ;)

Stay Tuned................

Pet Peeves

A quick note on my pet peeves:

1)If you are going to claim that you "....get bored if you are not intellectually stimulated...", please do not spell bored "Board". I mean it really detracts from the statement.

2)If I am half way out of my parking space, a la ass sticking out so far that it stops you from passing me, do not honk like I am in your way. I realize that you were absent the day they handed out patience, but there is a first time for everything. Rude!

Thanks and Good Night!

Thursday, August 18, 2005

For the Hell of it

What was I doing 10 years ago?
I was 16 years old, in high school, Just about to start my sophmore year.

What was I doing 5 years go?
Working with Liz at my current job and going to school.
What was I doing 1 year ago?
Working at this job, nothing exciting about that.
What was I doing yesterday? Went to work, got my hair cut and then Shawn came over.

What am I doing today?
Working, then to dinner with the girls.
Five snacks I enjoy:
Hummus,Cheese, Peanuts, veggies, and Mostly hummus
Five bands I like:Rob Thomas, Antigone Rising, Velvet Revolver, Black Eyed Peas, Anna Nalick
Five things I would do with a million dollars:
1) Buy a larger place
2) Buy a vacation home in England
3) Buy a new car
4) Invest the rest
Five locations I would like to run away to:
1) Greece
2) Portofino
3) Hawaii
4) Italy
5) England
Five bad habits:
1) Swearing
2) Losing my temper
3) Second Guessing people ( especially people I am dating)
4) Not Doing the Dishes
5) Jaded
Five things I like doing:
1) Reading
2) Watching movies
3) Hanging out with my friends
4) Kissing
5) Haning out with my 1 year old Nephews
Five TV shows I like:
1) Wanted
2) Over There
3) Rescue Me
4) The O.C
5) CSI
Five famous people I would like to meet:
1) Queen Elizabeth
2) M.C. Escher
3) Maya Angelou
4) Vlad Tepes
5) Angelina Jolie ( for her work with the UN)
Biggest joys in my life at the moment:
My Friends they are my sisters, my rocks that keep me from jumping.
Five favorite toys:
1) My Make Up
2) Digital Camera
3) Tivo
4) My jewlery
5) Ipod

My Names

Since I do not have the time at work to post meaningful satires, I will do this instead:

1. YOUR PORN STAR NAME: (Name of first pet / Street you live on):
Storm Central

2. YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME: (Name of your favorite snack food / Grandfather's first name):
Hummus Thane

3. YOUR FASHION DESIGNER NAME: (First word you see on your left / Favorite restaurant):
North Cascal

4. EXOTIC FOREIGNER ALIAS: (Favorite Spice / Last Foreign Vacation Spot):
Chipotle England

5. SOCIALITE ALIAS: (Silliest Childhood Nickname / Town Where You First Partied):
Tilly Mountain View

6. "FLY GIRL/BOY" ALIAS (a la J. Lo): (First Initial / First Two or Three Letters of your Last Name):
E. Ter

7. ICON ALIAS: (Something Sweet Within Sight / Any Liquid in Your Kitchen):
Milkyway Champagne

8. DETECTIVE ALIAS: (Favorite Baby Animal / Where You Went to High School):
Kitten Los ALtos

9. BARFLY ALIAS: (Last Snack Food You Ate / Your Favorite Alcoholic Drink):
Scone Lemon Drop

10. SOAP OPERA ALIAS: (Middle Name / Street Where You First Lived):
Joann Monroe

11. ROCK STAR ALIAS: (Favorite Candy / Last Name Of Favorite Musician):
Gummi Cola Bottles Nalick

12. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: ( First 2 letters of your first name and the first 3 Letters from your last name makes your first name. Take the first 2 letters of your mother's maiden name and the first 3 letters of the city you were born in):
Elter SiPal

Have Fun!

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

Top 10's

Liz's List of 10 Turn Ons and 10 Turn Offs

Turn Ons

1. Laughter
2. Carrot Cake
3. Books
4. A good hug
5. Honesty
6. Rain
7. Good Food
8. Smiles
9. Tattoos
10. Facial Hair ( goatee, beard)

Turn Offs

1. A sense of entitlement
2. Olives
3. Flakey People
4. Bad Teeth
5. Picky Eaters
6. Emotionally self involved people that have no idea that they are hurting someone else with their carelessness
7. Dentist/Doctors
8. Two Different shades of black ( i.e. black top and black pants that aren't the same shade of black)
9. Badly Behaved Children
10. The smell of Cigars ( bleecchh)

So there you go! Your turn!

Whistling Tutorial

As the nearest and dearest to my heart know, I have the ability to whistle in a cool way. I am not talking about the whistle while you work sort of way,but the fingers in the mouth high pitched piercing whistle of a hard core sports fan that paints themselves the color of their team. Except I limit myself to just the whistling part. My friends think its cool ( or they are lieing to me ) as long as they are like a mile away. Have I mentioned it's a little piercing, we are talking ear plugs and a 100 yard restraining order loud. So back to the cool part, I am always getting asked how I am able to whistle like that and of course it comes with a little story..... My sixth grade teacher use to get our attention by this piercing whistle and of course I thought it was cool. I mean think of the possibilities hailing cabs, obsessed sports fan ( which I am not), loud noise at concerts, calling to animals that can hear the piercing sound, the options are endless. So I set about learning this new and fun talent.

I have since mastered this fun and annoying talent and a few of my friends have asked that I teach them. If I had know how absolutely hilarious this would be, I would have set up classes a long time ago, just for laughs. So Friday night we ( a group of friends) were at the Dave Matthews Concert , what better place to have the Whistling Tutorial, than at a concert , oh wait we can barely hear ourselves. But that didn't stop us. So we started with the basics: finger placement, tongue angle ( get your minds out of the gutter) , and pressure. I have three faces watching me intently watching me, trying to gain the secret to the annoying whistle. Very technical conversations ensues about angle and wind flow, and all I can think of, I swear if anyone was listening to this conversation they would collapse in to giggles, I mean we were half of the time anyway. My students Mary, Trevor and Michele are intently attempting to whistle ( I will post picture of this funny event). Its not an easy task, I will tell you that. Here we have the three of them, fingers in mouth and the sounds of air rushing by their fingers with no effect. Have I failed as a teacher, can it be possible that I am no good at this at all? Nah, it just takes awhile. Michele but the end of the evening has managed to produce a beginning whistle and by the end of the weekend , I started to question why I had thought teaching people to whistle loud, shrill-ly, and annoyingly. I created another whistling me, who thinks it funny to whistle shrill-ly at any time just to gain a scowl from the people closest geographically. All I have to say is BestFriend Tiff, I am sorry and beware. Michele is getting better everyday.

Friday, August 12, 2005

All The Things You Didn't Want To Know

(x) smoked a cigarette
( ) tried chewing tobacco
(x) smoked a cigar
(x) smoked anything else
(x) kissed a member of the same sex
( ) crashed a friend's car (no but I'm pretty good at crashing my own)
(x) been in love
(x) been dumped
(x) shoplifted
(x) been fired
( ) been in a fist fight (um only once - and then we became friends)
( ) snuck out of parent's house
(x) had feelings for someone who didn't have them back
( ) been arrested
(x) made out with a strangers
(x) gone on a blind date
( ) joined the mile-high club (no but am dying to!)
(x) lied to a friend
(x) had a crush on a teacher
(x) skipped school
( ) seen someone die
(x) been to Canada (too cold!)
(x) been to Mexico
(x) been on a plane
(x) eaten Sushi
(x) been snowboarding
( ) been moshing at a concert
( ) Bungee-jumped
( ) Jumped out of a plane
( ) been surfing
( ) scuba dived
( ) rode a motorcycle (note it says "rode" not "drove")
(x) driven a boat ( House Boat Count?)
( ) water skied (AND wake boarded!)
(x) been in an abusive relationship
(x) taken painkillers
(x) love/LIKE someone right now
(x) laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by
(x) made a snow angel
(x) flown a kite
(x) built a sand castle
(x) gone puddle jumping
(x) played dress up
( ) danced in a sun shower
( ) jumped into a pile of leaves ( Umm Eww)
(x) gone sledding
(x) gone snowtubing
(x) gone water tubing
(x) cheated while playing a game
(x) been lonely
(x) fallen asleep at work/school
( ) used a fake ID
(x) watched the sun set
(x) watched the sun rise (once in Mexico - spectacular!)
(x) felt an earthquake
(x) touched a snake
(x) been tickled
( ) been robbed
( ) robbed someone
(x) pet a reindeer/goat
(x) won a contest
( ) been suspended from school ( Can I make a 1/2 X, bc I almost did?
(x) had detention
(x) been in a car accident
( ) had braces
(x) eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night
(x) had deja vu
( ) danced in the moonlight
(x) hated the way you look
( ) witnessed a crime
(x) questioned your heart
( ) been obsessed with post-it notes
(x) squished barefoot through the mud ( At a very young age)
(x) been lost
(x) been to the opposite side of the country
(x) swam in the ocean
(x) felt like dying
(x) cried yourself to sleep
( ) played cops and robbers
( ) recently colored with crayons/colored pencils/markers
(x) sung karaoke
(x) paid for a meal with only coins
(x) done something you told yourself you wouldn't
( ) made prank phone calls
(x) laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose
(x) caught a snowflake on your tongue
(x) kissed in the rain
(x) written a letter to Santa Claus
(x) been kissed under a mistletoe
(x) watched the sun set with someone you care about
(x) blown bubbles
(x) made a bonfire on the beach
( ) crashed a party
(x) have traveled more than 5 days with a car full of people
(x) gone rollerskating/blading
(x) had a wish come true
(x) worn pearls
( ) jumped off a bridge
( ) ate cat food
( ) told a complete stranger you loved them
(x) sang in the shower
(x) have a little black dress
(x) Had a dream that you married someone
(x) glued your hand to something
( ) got your toungue stuck to a pole
( ) kissed a fish
(x) worn the opposite sexes clothes
( ) been a cheerleader
(x) sat on a roof top
(x) screamed at the top of your lungs
(x) done a one-handed cartwheel
(x) dived off a high board
( ) jumped off a cliff into the ocean
(x) climbed up a waterfall ( it was dried up, but at one time it use to be a waterfall)
( ) talked on the phone for more than 6 hours
(x) stayed up all night
(x) didnt take a shower for a week ( In my defense I had had surgery)
( ) pick and ate an apple right off the tree
(x) climbed a tree
( ) had a tree house
(x) are scared to watch scary movies alone
( ) believe in ghosts
(x) have more then 30 pairs of shoes
(x) worn a really ugly outfit to school
( ) gone streaking
( ) played ding-dong-ditch
(x) played chicken fight
( ) been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on
(x) been told you're beautiful by a complete stranger
( ) broken a bone (cracked a bone)
(x) been easily amused
( ) caught a fish then ate it
( ) caught a butterfly
(x) laughed so hard you cried
(x) cried so hard you laughed
(x) mooned/flashed someone
(x) had someone moon/flash you
(x) cheated on a test
(x) forgotten someone's name
(x) slept naked
(x) French braided someones hair
(x) gone skinny dippin in a pool
( ) been kicked out of your house

Now you go!

Thursday, August 11, 2005

50 Useless Facts About Me

50 useless facts about me

1. Your name spelled backwards: zil or htebazile

2. Where were your parents born? My mother was born in Canterbury England and my Father was born at Stanford Medical Center in Palo Altos, Ca.

3. What is the last thing you downloaded onto your computer? The hardware to my wireless router and wireless card. I am so proud of myself !!!

4. What's your favorite restaurant? Cascal, Fiesta Del Mar Too, Aerole, and Jardinere.
5. Last time you swam in a pool? 7/11 the day of the picnic

6. Have you ever been in a school play? No, can't say that I have. Fear of public speaking started at a young age.

7. How many kids do you want? 2 I think. While I loved being an only child, I am not sure that everyone else does.

8. Type of music you dislike most? Death Metal.

9. Are you registered to vote? Of Course.

10. Do you have cable? yes, yes I do.

11. Have you ever ridden on a moped? no siree

12. Ever prank call anybody? I think I have, but I am getting old and the memory is getting worse.

13. Ever get a parking ticket? Who hasn't
14. Would you go bungee jumping or sky diving? No, I can't say that I would.

15. Furthest place you ever traveled? England

16. Do you have a garden? Nope, I suscribe to the theory of fake plants, everyone is happy and no one gets hurts.

17. What's your favorite comic strip? Get Fuzzy

18. Do you really know all the words to your national anthem? Yes

19. Bath or Shower, morning or night? Shower every morning after the gym. Sometimes twice a day if I am going out in the evening.
20. Best movie you've seen in the past month? March of the Penguins

21. Favorite pizza topping? Extra Sauce, extra Cheese.
22. Chips or popcorn? chips, Jalapeno or BBQ

23. What color lipstick do you usually wear? Have you seen my make up collection, I think I have enough lip gloss to wear a different color for at least a month.

24. Have you ever smoked peanut shells? Exactly what does that accomplish, can anyone explain this to me.

25. Have you ever been in a beauty pageant? See prior post, the comment about being a late bloomer. Enough said!

26. Orange Juice or apple? Apple Juice

27. Who was the last person you went out to dinner with and where did you dine? Liz and the twins Will and Jack, we had Salvadorian food. When I say we, I mean Liz and I.

28. Favorite type chocolate bar? Caramello, ooey gooey caramel, oh and there is chocolate involved too.

29. When was the last time you voted at the polls? 2004 and glad to see that made a difference ( heavy sarcasm)

30. Last time you ate a homegrown tomato? 4th of July I think.

31. Have you ever won a trophy? Do Ribbons count at trophys?

32. Are you a good cook? I delude myself and my dad and friends humor me .

33. Do you know how to pump your own gas? Dear god, people don't know how to pump their own gas?
34. Ever order an article from an infomercial? Yes, but only once. Winsor Pilates DVD's.

35. Sprite or 7-up? 7-up

36. Have you ever had to wear a uniform to work? Yes I have. Khaki pants and a red shirt. And no I wasn't working at Target.

37. Last thing you bought at a pharmacy? Birth Control

39. Would you prefer being a millionaire or find true love? Money can't buy everything, so true love then.

40. Do you believe in love at first sight? No, I don't.

41. Ever call a 1-900 number? What so a some freak show can read my future, no thank you!

42. Can ex's be friends? I think you can be civil to each other but I think friendship is very hard to obtain.

43. Who was the last person you visited in a hospital? My grandfather before he died.

44. Did you have a lot of hair when you were a baby? Nope, I was bald but still very cute.

45. What message is on your answering machine? Hello, you have reached XXX-XXXX, please leave a message at the tone"

46. What's your all time favorite Saturday Night Live Character? I don't think I have one.

47. What was the name of your first pet? Thats a hard one, we had alot of animals. There was Storm, the doberman, Doodles, the Border Collie, Salty the Skiperkee, and various cats and ducks.

48. What is in your purse? A wallet, cell phone, starbucks card, lip gloss, the essentials :)

49. Favorite thing to do before bedtime? Typically I read before bed.

50. What is one thing you are grateful for today? A wonderful group of friends that I am honored to call my family.

Now you Post this!!

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Jello Trilogy- Part One

Back in my younger years ( ok fine, maybe about 2 or 3 years ago)I met a girl who liked my playboy shirt. Always a great start to any relationship, its built on porn. Ok not really, but that caught your eye didn't it. We will call this girl "Jello Girl", no she didn't have any special powers to control the mold and texture of Jello, talk about a useless power. Jello Girl, was a budding business woman, breaking out in to the cut throat world of promotional modeling. Ever seen a Budweiser Girl, well she looked like one of those girls. Gorgeous, cupid lips and a personality to boot. Hence the reason we met. Back in the day of my bad habits, I was outside having a cigarette, flirting with the bouncers (thats a whole other blog opportunity), and standing outside doing the same thing I was, minus the cigarette was, Jello Girl. We started chatting, having lost interest in the bouncers, and she filled me in on her business and the fact that she was on the hunt for new girls. She gave me a card and told I should really call her. Now I am just flattered, I didn't realize that the Playboy shirt worked on both sexes, interesting fact. I fiddled with the card and the idea of me as a promotional model for a few days. I was what you would call "late bloomer", I didn't really grow out of my ugly duckling stage until after I was in college and it took a serious intervention, Thank you BestFriend Tiff!!! But I digress.......

Back to the story at hand........So why not, what did I have to lose, right?? I called Jello Girl and away it goes. The first couple of times that I went out to hock jello shots, Jello Girl was with me to show me the ropes. A few simple rules applied, 1) Your tips depend on what you wear, some might find it demeaning but in my case as I always say I couldn't hide my " assets" with duct tape and burlap. So it really didn't matter what I wore, but there were a few tops that could accentuate the positive. 2) Glitter, and alot of it. The different colors and ways to apply it. Its kind of like looking thru a disco ball, really fun after a few drinks. 3) SMILE, even if it hurts. Now, the next step is to balance a tray of jello shots, with a cash box in one hand while moving thru a crowd packed tight with drunks. If that isn't multi tasking, I don't know what is. They defintely don't teach these skills in school. As I am babbling I am trying to remember the first club I was at......No luck, I remember the club later that night I went to as I ventured out on my own, The Velvet Lounge. So an hour at Club A to get the routine down and then off to the Velvet Lounge, to try my wings. That first night taught me alot of things; a) People seriously have an aversion to hermedically sealed plastic condiment containers filled with alcoholic jello. All I have to say is that these jello shots have nothing on the ones The BestFriend and I made ( note add equal parts water and vodka, equal parts vodka and vodka only lead to being very drunk in minutes.)b) No is not in the Drunk Dictionary, every girl needs to buy herself a copy. and c) Damn the money was nice.......

Keep your glasses ready for the next shot..............

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

I am a bad friend

So I am one of those annyoing people who bring her digital camera, takes pictures and then promises to send them to everyone and never does. In my defense, I have weakly been operating on, gasp, a phone line for my computer, how arcaic!!!But TADA, I got DSL today, so to make amends for my photo hording, here is a link to the Kodak Gallery with the photos.


Tuesday, August 02, 2005

Command Decision

I have made a command decision. It will alter my life as I know it. Ok, not really...............Here I will fill you in. So as my friends will tell you, a little to eagerly sometimes, I can be a little slow on the uptake. So here it goes, last week I was having a much deserved drink ( ok more than one) with Christine. We enjoy getting together to sit down and solve life’s problem with Vodka ( I know how that sounds :) , I meant it to), like any proper lady would. We went to this new restaurant at Santana Row, found a cute little lounge area where we could comfortably talk, laugh and sigh at what life throws you. This is all back ground so hang in there...... A band came to play at the restaurant, but apparently our little lounge area was prime real estate and we were promptly shifted to the bar area. Christine and I are chatting away, with no real interest in what is happening around us, but we are facing the bartenders. Drinks run low and ah what the hell, we have plenty of time to drown another one. Our bartender was definitely easy on the eyes, I wouldn’t mind running in to him in a dark alley. We order our drinks from Mr. Hottie, and in the course of this Mr. Hottie makes a comment about the top I am wearing. It’s a favorite of mine, coral in color, V-neck, hip length ( all the guys are groaning now, hey if it was a car part I was describing, I would have your full attention), with white block writing that says Brooklyn. So he asked me if I was from Brooklyn, I proclaimed to him, please reference the above mentioned drinks, that I wouldn’t be caught dead broadcasting the city I was from on my chest. The cheeky bartender coyly states, “ It looks good anyway.”. After the warm fuzzy feeling of having a man pay you, albeit a compliment about my rack, a compliment just the same, it dawns on me that A) He was fully checking out my rack and admitted it and B) damn he is hot, wait wait, he was checking out my rack!!!!!!. Can’t say that I was really that offended, cute boy talking to me, we will let it slide. Funny thing though, I was at Trader Joe’s last night grocery shopping for the week and here I am standing in line checking out. My checker, we will call him Grandad, to make a point, is intently looking at my chest, not that I noticed this really. He innocently tried to sounding out loud, what my t-shirt said. It was white with purple cursive. Nothing special. So he asks me finally, what my shirt says and I admit with to him that I have no idea. But it occurs to me that Grandad has been intently staring at my chest , see slow on the uptake. Feeling more than a little embarrassed and looking around to see if anyone else is paying attention to this weird conversation, thankfully no one was. I think Grandad noticed the level of my discomfort, because then he tried to start explaining himself, swearing that he truly was reading my shirt and nothing else. Well ummm, you see, the letters are distorted by MY BREASTS! To even make out what the letters formed you would have to study closely. Ummm, no thanks!!!! At least not by Grandad. Man, why oh why, didn’t I get in to either a line with a woman checker or at least an attractive checker. So the command decision, the life altering change, no more t-shirts with writing on them, unless of course it’s a Hooter’s t-shirt or a Playboy, because in that case hell, I am asking for it. My friends that have seen me in the flesh are now hopefully laughing but mostly saying, rriiiiiigggghhhtttt, it’s the writing that is drawing their attention.